Coaching is about you.
Wonderful, intelligent, sensitive you.
Yes, you are special.
Coaching is about serving that specialness and allowing your uniquness to flourish.
Nothing removes blocks, depression, fear and wounds more than knowing in your heart and soul that you deserve to be acknowledged, encouraged, safe and wanted.
But here's the thing.
Deserving is an actual skill. So few of us have learned this skill and don't even actually realize it is a skill.
But think about it. Who teaches us? No one.
Deserving allows you to thrive in every area in your life. You turn into a great leader. Fall madly in love. Become a better friend, family member and a much happier partner. Your self-care explodes organically. You want to take care of yourself.
You learn another skill; permission to stop hating yourself for hating yourself.
WHAT? Yep. Permission is a great skill. And here's why.
Guess what is the polar opposite of deserving ?
Can you guess?
It's guilt. Guilt is the opposite of deserving.
And man, is that guilt a killer. Guilt keeps you small, it tells you not to speak up, settle for less and deny your wants.
It's why you walk away from the book you want to write, not charge more for your services. It's why you can't lose the weight. Can't find a relationship that nurtures you. It's why you keep giving up.
And, to top it all off, you feel guilty for feeling guilty.
You feel guilty for hating yourself.
You feel guilty for not being happy.
I have been mentoring and coaching men and women for decades and I'm telling you, this is the core of every issue. It manifests in every single area of life.
Deserving and permission. Your new superpowers.
Nothing can stand up to them.
Not creative blocks, fear of success, addiction issues, co-dependancy and relationship issues, fear of intimacy, anger, depression, sexual dissatisfaction... you name it.
Deserving and Permission. It's more fun than you can imagine. It's easier than you think. I'm going to share a few of the things that happen in a session below.
If you have any questions. Give me a call.
The whole point of homework is taking these new skills and practicing them. Repition is how we all got into these problems and repetition is how we're going to find our way out. Homework is fun, easy and you never have to do it or turn in any papers. You're the teacher. I ask what you want and then give you back the way to whatever that is.
Skill 1. Deserving.
This is my favorite. It is Christmas morning in your heart and soul each time you remember you deserve. It's how you start connecting with your wants. So often our authentic wants are hidden under a PILE of guilt... we get to uncover them one by one.
Skill 1.2 Communication Skills
Finally figuring what you want is fantastic - and new and confusing- and how do you do that? Conflict is not the attack, it's the defense. You discover the skill of awareness in your communication. Example? How you have been experiencing another's truth as an attack on your own. And it isn't. Ever.
Skill 1.3 Your Truth Isn't An Attack On Mine.
This is one of the most rewarding and freeing skills you will ever, ever, ever learn. Ever. Ever. Ever.
Skill 2. Permission
This is where the fun really starts. You have permission to fail, be afraid, cry, laugh inappropriately. Permission is the expression of acceptance. It frees and it allows play and forgiveness in the face of guilt and shame. It's very, very powerful.